A group of us got together for some great beer at Sin and Redemption a few weeks ago. It was the usual social gathering; some good drinks, some great company, the one bitch you wish would shut-up, and some good old relationship talk. It never ceases to amaze me the opinions or stories that come up about sex and relationships when alcohol is involved. But on the most part we all were fairly happy with where our lives were heading.
I was approaching that line where I was no longer buzzed but becoming drunk, so I decided to call it a night and say goodbye to everyone. As I was leaving my friend Lacey came stumbling after me. “I am heading the same way you are so I thought I would leave as well,” she said with a smile. I always enjoy good company so I told her that she was more than welcome to join me. Also I could use a person to hold on to because the I was starting to get the spins.
We continued down the sidewalk in silence for a few minutes and then Lacey blurted, “My boyfriend is leaving the country for five months and I don’t know what is happening with us!” And just like that I was sober. I looked at her and said, “Tell me everything!”
Lacey and her boyfriend are that couple that are so sweet that they almost make you want to vomit. They never get into any serious fights, they are loving in public, and they have a great sex life. But just recently her boyfriend’s job was about to take him to China for five months. I don’t know about you, but I personally couldn’t go from seeing a boy all the time to not being able to touch them for five whole months. Lacey then looked at me with her eyes starting to water, “We haven’t even talked about what is going to happen to us. I am just scared it won’t be what I want to hear.”
How does distance change a relationship? Does it make it stronger or does it mean the end? Does distance really make the heart grow fonder or is that something we tell ourselves to help us cope with the pain? Now in Lacey’s case I know that they will be fine. Lacey and her boyfriend have been away from each other for months before and are stronger than ever, so how would this be any different?
After comforting her with the known facts from her past Lacey looked at me and said, “I just hate that I am so dependent on him. Before I was so strong, but now I don’t know what I would do if I lost him.” I felt like the wind was knocked out of me as I instantly thought of losing my man. Maybe it is not the fear of having our loved ones on the other side of the world that scares us so much. Maybe it is the thought that if something were to end our relationship we just might not have the strength to survive.